Is this the beginning or the end...

Although this is the last entry in my reflective journal before the hand in date it feels very much like the beginning of my journey. I can't stop now! My obsessive personality won't allow it. Although I'm working on pieces for the final exhibition I feel like I'm actually working on something on a much larger scale as I continue to build my collections. I envisage this will take up my entire life for however long that may be but fear not...it shall all continue to be documented in one form or another. I feel like I'm on the verge of something. Here's to the next 15 sketchbooks!

The curious case of E.V.B...

I am currently on the look out for an old display cabinet. I love the idea of displaying my sketchbooks and three dimensional work on shelves in some kind of cabinet, similar to the vintage 'cabinet of curiosities' idea. I'm trying to source a cabinet with a glass front similar to that of a museum. The objects inside are all aspects of my life. By putting them behind glass I'm still protecting them and myself slightly. On the opening of the exhibition I will be able to open the glass and people can look through the sketchbooks but I then have the option of closing it again afterwards. It's also very important to me that the cabinet is second hand and preferably has some age to it. I love antiques and vintage items and everything I surround myself with, including my house, fits in to these categories. I like the objects I collect to have had a previous life before I obtain them, therefore I feel that the display cabinet should also share these qualities.
I shall continue scouring the antique shops until I find a cabinet to contain 'The Curious Case of E.V.B.'

Sketchbook 14 update...

Before I leave you (only temporarily) I thought I'd give you a brief update on sketchbook 14 and where I'm up to. It is unusual for me to have found a new sketchbook to work in before I have finished the previous one. I'm itching to start working in the new one but I have such fondness and am so familiar with sketchbook 14 that I'm actually quite attached to it. I always get like this. I suppose people don't like change do they and my sketchbooks are almost like friends.

I feel very comfortable with the format I use. At no point do my sketchbooks feel forced. They are very natural outpourings of the rubbish that is going on in my head and make total sense to me. They have naturally developed and grown with me and so I feel like they are completely part of me. To let people actually look through them is a big deal to me. I am a private person and don't often let people in. Sharing my sketchbooks is frightening but that doesn't mean it's not worthwhile.

The addition of texture...

As I've been quite unsure about the addition of colour on my digital illustrations I've decided to confuse matters even further and add texture. I know, I'll never learn. Giving myself more options is really not a good thing but it just felt like a natural progression to me.

The addition of texture makes the illustrations feel very different from the diagrammatical qualities of the black and white line illustrations. I think this is what I like about them. They feel more like actual objects and not flat illustrations. However, I'm still not sure of the outcome I want. I suppose my sketchbooks offer flat, two dimensional illustrations in abundance and it would be a good idea to introduce further variety to my work.

Although the texture is subtle (compare it to the 'addition of colour' post and you'll see!) I do like the finish. I think they work better when the textured illustrations are grouped together.
Do you know, I think this is the look I will go for in my three large scale pieces. I think I have cracked it! I'm excited about it now and can visualise what I want the pieces to look like. Now there is just the small task of creating all the illustrations.

Sketchbook 15?...

I have been given a beautiful little sketchbook and was wondering whether it could be my next sketchbook. The only thing is, it's tiny. Are my sketchbooks going to keep getting smaller and smaller and is this just a little too far? It is lovely though and crying out to be drawn in so I think it would be rude not to!

It looks like it was made for me. Don't worry though, I shall remain disciplined and finish sketchbook 14 first. I'm not that reckless!

The addition of colour?...

I have been toying with the idea of adding colour to the digital illustrations. To be honest...I still am! Part of me wants very minimal colour or even black and white imagery but part of me also wants to use full colour. I'm not yet sure which one I will opt for so I'm going to play for a little longer until I feel happy with the decision I have made. I wonder if it would be possible to have some images in colour and others black and white? I like the idea of the pieces feeling a little incomplete so some illustrations may be more finished than others and may not feature in full on the page. I love the idea of the illustrations continuing over the edge of the page, as if they have been captured in a moment and are not quite in frame. (Is that the photographer in me talking?)

It still stands that negative space is very important to me so the placement of the objects will be considered and all three pieces may not contain the same amount of imagery. I should really be getting busy drawing with all these ideas in my head. The question of colour still remains unanswered for now but I shall continue until I have one!

The safety of numbers...

The grouping of objects somehow pleases me. I like them to be nestled amongst other objects. It makes me feel safe and happy. I also believe the end result of these groupings is a form of self portrait. These objects that I collect and have spent two years recording in various formats are now being placed together to reveal to the viewer (whoever that may be) a little bit about myself and a small glimpse in to my world. I have to admit, I would only allow a small glimpse anyway!

Here I am in object format! I still envisage there being three large scale pieces similar to this one but hopefully with more objects. The real question is...To colour or not to colour?

The digital drawing continues...

I'm still considering the large scale (possibly A1) prints of my drawings to be displayed on the wall of my exhibition space. As a result I have been very busy creating digital illustrations from my original drawings of the hoardings of objects in my life. I want these digital illustrations to still have all the 'quirks' and imperfections of my original drawings so have been playing around with suitable ways to do this. I've been using Illustrator as it gives me control over the thickness of line I am using to create my illustrations and so this more closely resembles my drawing style.

I love the simplicity and the diagrammatical quality of the illustrations. They feel like a diagram of my life! They also look quite like the images you may find in a child's colouring in book. I like that! I actually have an urge to colour them in myself. I have to admit though that I would be very particular about staying in the lines. There's also something quite refreshing about having the ability to reproduce these images as much as I choose, unlike the majority of my other work that are 'one offs!'

I came across a designer called Tim Boelaars whilst I was perusing the usual websites for inspiration and I was quite taken with the simplicity of his work. It reminded me of the digtal illustrations I have been creating.

Although they are more simplistic than my illustrations I love the grouping of them in to little collections of related objects. This is what my initial drawings were all about. Perhaps I should consider a more uniform approach to my presentation but would that suggest a more rigidly organised person created them? Don't get me wrong I am super organised but there is a little inner chaos going on and I feel the arrangement of my objects on the page hints at that. 

A sudden realisation...

I have realised, after many meetings at University, many conversations with friends and a considerable amount of time, that it may appear like I am producing very little work! I am hiding my thoughts, feelings and the bulk of my work in my sketchbooks, which can be shut again after the recording has taken place and then look no different than if no recording had taken place! Am I doing myself a disservice by hiding my exhaustive recording away? I am working in my sketchbooks most evenings and on opening them this is clear but what if nobody opens my sketchbooks at the exhibition? It may appear that I have very little work because the majority of it is not large or bulky or three dimensional. However, if I were to remove my sketchbooks then the remaining work would not make sense. My work means nothing without those little books. I only hope people take the time to open them and have a peek (but not for too long or read them in too much detail because that thought terrifies me and would open up my world to far too many people. No strangers allowed!) All I need to consider now is how these books will be displayed in the exhibition. I've been thinking about making some wooden cabinets for them or perhaps find an old antique/vintage one to create my own cabinet of curiosities, then I can include my three dimensional fabric objects aswell. Clearly this will need more thought...

This is not sketchbook...

This is not really a sketchbook, if it is it's the smallest one I have created. I wanted to document it here as it combines my love of many things, drawing, the mundane, negative space, minimal colour and text. I feel like these are the main themes in my work. I also quite like the idea of producing one long continuous drawing/sketchbook.

Here I am giving myself more ideas when I haven't even completed the ideas that are already in my head. There really isn't enough time!

Sketchbook progress...

This was where it all began. Sketchbooks 1,2,3 and 4 are A5 exercise books similar to those used in school. As soon as I saw them they needed to be filled with scrawlings and scribblings about my life and the joy of the mundane. I guess this was a slippery slope as now I can't stop documenting...everything!

(I'm not convinced the floral quilt added to the overall look of the photograph but you get the idea.)

Negative space has always been an important part of my work. I feel that you can reveal a lot about something by the information you actually miss out and I like to think of my work continuing over the edge of the pages and on to a life of it's own somewhere. Sketchbooks 5,6,7 and 8 took on a slightly different format and explored this negative space further.

For your information...I broke the mould when creating sketchbook 7 and even used felt tips! I remember the joy of being young and getting a brand, spanking new packet of felt tips and being desperate to open them and colour over pages and pages of paper. Felt tips were always banned in school when I was young so I guess it's just the rebel in me that wants to use them now. I also think they're great tools because of their rubbish-ness. As you know by now I'm quite inspired by the everyday and this includes everyday tools, such as biros and felt tips. It makes me want to draw with them right now just writing about it! Oh, and tipp ex, don't forget tipp ex!

The natural thing for me to do was to take my drawings in to computer packages and work over the top of them. This is something I would ask my students to do. I like the slick look of computer generated imagery but it really wouldn't work with my imperfect drawing style so I thought about creating lines directly over the lines I had drawn so the computer generated versions would still feel slightly imperfect and flat. This is where sketchbooks 9 and 10 came in.

My plan is still to document the objects that I fill my house with and then redraw them using Illustrator like the above image. I have always imaged there being 3 large scale pieces (maybe A1?) filled with such drawings as a back drop for my exhibition. I've done it again haven't I! I've already grouped them in to threes...safety in numbers! I like the idea of these pieces having various degrees of negative space, similarly to the sketchbooks I have previously mentioned.

Sketchbook 11 is a whole different story. As I also teach Photography and collect old cameras I wanted to be able to explore this aspect of my life without simply drawing them. I am particularly interested in old cameras that use film or polaroids and so what better way to document my life and surroundings than by photographing them. As I am interested in the mundane and the ordinary I wanted my images to be exploring the beauty in these. I must confess that sketchbook 11 is an ongoing project and is likely to remain so for a long time.

I think I have come in to my element in sketchbooks 12, 13 and 14. These sketchbooks are A6 in size and have opened up a whole new world to me. They are small enough to take everywhere...and I have. I cannot imagine working in a sketchbook of any other size, in fact the thought repulses me! I have had some trouble finding suitable sketchbooks but my quest continues and I shall only use A6 sketchbooks from now on. I have no idea why but the size is absolutely perfect.

I even feel happy just writing about these sketchbooks!

So, this is where I'm up to. Half way through sketchbook 14, already with thoughts of sketchbook 15. It has been very useful for me to recap in this way. There seems to be a theme to all these sketchbooks when I thought they were actually random. There I go again, trying to find patterns. I guess patterns and groups are a way of organising my life. If I categorise and organise then all is well and I can handle life! No problems at all!

A little recap...

I thought, with it being a new year, it would be an ideal time to have a quick recap of where I'm up to. I'll start with the sketchbooks.

So far I have nearly completed 14 sketchbooks. For some reason I envisaged there being 15 in total by the time of my exhibition. I wonder what my obsession with numbers, groups and sets means? I seem to be working towards 15 and this has been my goal for some time. Being 15 was an important age for me as it was when I lost my brother and had to grow up quickly. So far I have lived for another 15 years without him. Perhaps this could explain my preoccupation with the number 15. On the other hand, maybe I'm just looking for patterns to explain things in life. Whatever the reason I'll still feel much happier if I have completed 15 sketchbooks come exhibition day...nearly there!